My Cave My View

Currently not available in the United States

My Cave My View

I Couldn't Make This Up

Humour

Author: Gary Torres

Dinosaur mascot

Language: English

Published by: AuthorHouse

Published on: 2nd November 2011

Format: LCP-protected ePub

Size: 330 Kb

ISBN: 9781467067072


Gary has used a Twain-like humor with a folksy small town snapshot of life to make us stop and reconsider our own life.

He opens up with humor and tenderness that will bring laughter and tears from the same page as he paints pictures of the people, places, and activities that surround him. He and his dog Turbo, his too kind and loving wife, and four children are the innocents abroad on a raft made of love, pain, laughter, and hope that is floating the mighty Mississippi of life somewhere in the West. From his experience raising kids, fighting cancer, running marathons his insights are like barbs on a fence that grab hold of you. Each section of the book contains small snippets of life and insights that make the reader pause to laugh at the character and themselves.

BATTLE OF THE SEXES

There it is...one blanket, one bed, two people. It is almost certain that someone is going to be cold tonight. Oh sure, we act cordial enough, remove our slippers, plump our pillows, shake the sheets, then position the mutual blanket and snuggle in for a good nights sleep; a wonderful ending to the age old battle of the sexes. A temporary truce of sorts, can't live with em, can't live without em.

YOU DRIVE ME CRAZY

You drive me crazy. There was a time when my wife said those words, and that was a good thing. Now, when she says those words, it is with a different tone and a different meaning. Its more like, YOU DRIVE ME CRAZY!!! And after being married and having kids I have come to decide that it is the little things that will eventually drive a person crazy.

BAGS, CHAPSTICK, AND SHOPPING

I'm sitting here in my cave, talking to my dog, Turbo. Do ya think that we'll ever understand women? He looked up, smiled and wagged his tail; I think he thought I said, Would ya like a bite of my sandwich? Whenever I talk, he must always think I say that, because he always smiles and wags his tail the same way.

MY OWN EMERGENCY ROOM VISIT

Well I can tell you one thing. Don't be going to the hospital if you want to get rest and relaxation. Just about the time I would fall asleep, some nurse would come in and shake me and say, How ya feeling? Are you getting plenty of rest? I need some more blood. This is going to sting just a tiny bit. And proceed to play pin the tail on the donkey again. Frankly, I was tired of the game and didn't want to be the donkey anymore (although many think I am a natural for the part).

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