Quiet, intense, and deadly, Riley is fated never to live the respectable life he convinces himself he craves. Smart, witty, and cocky, Cornelius fancies himself a lover, though he’s actually a bit of a bastard. Together, they’re a force to be reckoned with.

George Patton takes them to meet Pancho Villa. Winston Churchill dines with them. A mysterious secret agent targets them, forcing one to spy on Rosa Luxemburg and the other into a fixed boxing match refereed by a young fascist with a Charlie Chaplin mustache. Codebreakers, torturers, soldiers, lovers, even a daschund and a tiger — all of these figure into their adventures.

Riley and Cornelius’ lives trace the twists and turns of the Twentieth Century down unheard-of avenues. That is, assuming you believe them.