Introduction

The hardcore views and lampoons presented here are entirely my own—ruthlessly analyzed and synthesized mainly from New Testament sources. If you ask me why I write such a nasty book, my retort is, why do the Gospel narrators write such bad, asinine, pious fucking fiction? Why were the Gospel writers not serious, and why do they make a joke of their god, Jesus?

St Matthew should either be awarded Most Asinine Religious Writer of the Millennium or be sodomized with a broomstick. Theologians are extremely lousy analytic thinkers. For example, they and the educated Christians don't even know, or dare, to answer this sticky question over 2,000 years: Judas betrayed Jesus, but what was the substance of the betrayal? Was it over the stupid, limpid Sermons on the Mount, the Parable of Hidden Treasure, or Parable of the Pearl of Great Price?

Be prepared for a rough ride! This is PPG rated. (Pastor et Parental Guidance)